STRUGGLING WITH SERENDIPITY
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Events
  • Photos
  • Press and News
  • Resources

first anniversary

11/8/2016

0 Comments

 
Picture
(This blog tells my family's story. To see more, click "blog" at the top of this webpage.)

​
The high school’s Individual Education Plan for Beth focused on access: special desks, leaving class early, the private locker room, and getting down the steps during fire drills. At an IEP meeting, the principal asked her what she needed. She surprised me by requesting a place for her wheelchair in the student section of the stadium for home football games. She also mentioned the problem of others being too helpful. When someone grabbed a push handle on the back of her wheelchair, she reached around and lightly smacked their hand with her fist.

“I realized that my biggest challenge would be to insist on doing things myself and to become independent again,” Beth said. “At the risk of sounding corny, people are generally kind, so it was my responsibility to speak up for myself.”

The first anniversary of the accident came and went without discussion. It didn’t seem to phase Beth, other than an appreciation of how far she had come since then. At counseling, I rehashed the night of her injury. My guilt and anxiety were far from rational and out of my control. Certain that I had ruined Beth’s life, I needed a way to erase the injury and her losses. I wanted nothing less than the world at her fingertips, with hands and legs she could feel and move. With a cut spinal cord, the only chance of recovery would be medical miracles of the future, but I still couldn’t accept her injury—or my role in causing it.

The annual regional choir contest had been at Tiffin Columbian on the day Beth was injured on May 20. Early that morning, I had set up the concession stand in the cafeteria. After my girls sang, we left for Columbus. A year later, the choir contest would be out of town.

The director, Curtis King, complained when a handicapped-accessible school bus would not be available, but Beth didn’t mind driving with me. I brought a book along and opened it to discourage other parents from talking to me. I also perfected the art of hovering at a distance to be available to Beth, but out of the way. She sang with her 9th grade choir and Maria had a solo in the Women’s Chorus, all earning high marks, as usual. Without being asked, Mr. King and his father had built a portable ramp for the risers so Beth wouldn’t be the only choir member on the stage floor.


His unexpected kindness would be repeated by many in other times and places.

0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Cindy Kolbe

    Sign up for my Just Keep Swimming Newsletter by typing your email address in the box. Thanks!

    * indicates required

    Categories

    All
    Accident
    Adventure
    Anxiety
    Career
    Caregiving
    Chronic Pain
    College
    Counseling
    Depression
    Driving
    Fear
    Floating
    Friends
    Goals
    Graduation
    Gratitude
    Grief
    Group Home
    Guilt
    Harvard
    High School
    High School Swim Team
    Holidays
    Independence
    Injury
    Intensive Care
    Internship
    Job
    Moving
    Occupational Therapy
    Optimism
    Paralympics
    Paralympic Swim Team
    Perspective
    Physical Therapy
    Published Articles
    Rehab
    Road Trip
    Serendipity
    Spinal Cord Injury
    Sports
    Stanford
    Support
    Surgery
    Swim Club Team
    Swim Meet
    Swimming
    Travels
    Video
    Volunteering
    Writing

    Picture

    Archives

    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    July 2020
    May 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016

    RSS Feed

    Picture

    Picture

    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture

    Picture
Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Events
  • Photos
  • Press and News
  • Resources